On Being Transgender, Suffering Gender Dysphoria, and the Times

  This is probably going to be a long post, so most of you will likely not read the whole thing. Most people lack intellectual fortitude, which is what it takes to read long posts all the way through. I don't mean to be insulting (when I am, you'll definitely know), but I like to call 'em the way I see 'em. It especially takes intellectual fortitude to read a long post past the point at which it pisses you off, and I'll just bet I'm going to piss some of you off.

I woke up this morning at 1:11. After traipsing through the house to use the restroom, I went back to bed and tried for nearly two hours to get back to sleep. I finally had to admit defeat and get my tired (but not sleepy) ass out of bed. The reason I couldn't get back to sleep (no matter how hard I tried) is the usual. My brain started fussing over things that interest me. No matter what, once my brain gets going, I can't make it stop and go back into rest mode. It sucks, because it hinders my efforts to accomplish any worthwhile goals.

So, what had my aggravating brain worked up? Well... first off, a massive lie. A lie that started about seven-ish decades ago by people that I call societal manipulators. This particular lie has become so big, in fact, that the majority of western society believes this lie to be true. The lie is that sex and gender are the same thing. Nothing is further from the truth. The sexes are male and female, the genders are masculine and feminine. Commonly, males are masculine and females are feminine, but that's not always the case. In truth, there are feminine males and masculine females just about everywhere you look. This is the real transgenderism. I know that the common definition of a transgender is a person who identifies with the gender commonly associated with the opposite sex and alters their body to align with their gender identity. That definition simultaneously separates and confuses sex and gender. Look, you can be transgender and never have a clue if you don't realize that you're a feminine male, or a masculine female. How would you know, if you've never been truthfully taught about gender?

Those who modify their bodies to align with their gender identities do so because they suffer from a condition (not a mental illness) known as gender dysphoria. The causes of this condition vary. Some experience this with no apparent cause. So, no one can really pinpoint it. Last week, I came out as transgender, here on social media. I alluded to the fact that for decades I suffered from gender dysphoria. How this came about is probably fairly common, especially for older folks, like myself. When I was a young child (in the 60's), it was seen as shameful if a couple had a feminine son. I don't recall my life before my accident, but I know that afterward, I was feminine. I was eventually lovingly forced to suppress my gender and mimic masculinity. This does NOT villafy my parents; they were actually wonderful people, but they were also products of their time. But, times change. I was a product of my time, then. Now, I'm a product of this time. Yes, I am modifying my body, and for the first time in my life, I'm happy. Only someone who is going through this (or has already gone through this) would appreciate what I'm about to say. But every time I see myself in a mirror and notice how much more my breasts have grown, a joy surges through me that I can't describe. Will I undergo bottom surgery (vaginoplasty)? I'm not sure. Part of me wants to, but another part finds the prospect to be very daunting.

My kids still call me "Dad" and my siblings still call me "brother". I wouldn't have it any other way. You see, I'm not hung up on this pronoun bullshit. I can see why others commonly are, but I think there's just too much going on to worry about how someone refers to me, how they see me, or what they think of me. I'm a little more secure in myself than that. But, I'll tell you this: When my wife calls me her beautiful girl, or her precious princess, it puts me on "Cloud 9". So, what the hell does it matter what anyone else in the whole world thinks? Again, I can see why it matters to some, but it really doesn't mean a lot to me, personally. I believe that if we peacefully, yet unwaiveringly press on, we will change more hearts and minds than if we're abrasive. Remember, "you can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar."