I Didn't Know What I Didn't Know

     Yesterday morning, I awoke at two o'clock.  I tried to go back to sleep, but the longer I laid there the more obvious it became that it was a lost cause.  As I laid there, trying to go back to sleep, my mind wandered.  As it often does, it began skimming over my transition, thus far.  At this point, let me tell you that I am not a social person.  I have never been comfortable in social situations and strive to stay out of such as much as I possibly can.  That said, you'll understand when I say that, socially, my transition has been very slow going.  So it is that I haven't had to deal with social confrontation, yet.

    A scenario came to life in my mind:  How would I respond to a Christian if they were to ask me how I thought God must feel about me doing this?  I surmised that I would simply tell them my truth.  I had suffered, from childhood on, with gender dysphoria.  I didn't know what was wrong with me, only that something was.  I was different from other boys, and not just because I'd gotten hit by a car.  In that respect, I was (and still am) different from everyone I know.  I'm fine with that, because I wouldn't wish the life I've had on anyone.  But, I didn't like to do anything other boys liked to do, and as I got older that became more obvious to me.  I didn't know that I was suffering from gender dysphoria.

    You hear anti-trans people saying young children don't get the idea that they may not be in the right body.  Don't believe it!  All the way back in kindergarten, 5-6 years old, I had the idea that I wasn't in the right body.  No, it wasn't because of my disfigured leg.  I didn't want to be a boy.  I didn't like having a boy's body.  Hell, I didn't even like boys!  I liked the girls, but not in that way.  I liked them in the way that I wanted to be able to play what they were playing, do what they were doing.  I wanted to hang out with them.

    Whatever the boys took an interest in, I was forced by social convention to act as if I was interested in it, as well.  I hated that!  Especially when they started their sports bullshit!  I have absolutely no doubt that's why I have social anxieties.  I sincerely believe that convention is crap.  It makes parents think that they need to push their child to live performatively.  "Little boys/girls don't do that.  Here... do this, instead."  As a society, we somehow came to the conclusion that it's the parents' job to force their children to behave in manners that are unnatural to themselves.

    There are activists on the far-Right who push the social convention theory that it's the parents duty to push their children to live performatively.  They believe it's righteous; it may not be.  If you're training a transgender child (yes, that's a real thing) to be cisgender, you're not helping them; you're actually potentially causing them psychological harm.  For any of that to mean anything to you, you need to have empathy.  Some people believe empathy is a waste of time.  I used to be one of those people; this is no longer the case.

    If "conventional parents" teach their transgender child to be cisgender, I can tell you from experiential knowledge, you will teach that child that they aren't good enough.  Furthermore, if you teach them that being transgender is sinful, or against God's plan for them, you will cause them to hate themselves.  They will come to believe that God isn't interested in them unless they can be something that is unnatural for them.

    I know you may think that it's not natural for a male to become female, or vice-versa, but it is completely natural for some males to be feminine and for some females to be masculine.  That's okay!  Teach your child to be their best self, no matter what.  If you have a feminine son, let him know that's okay, and teach him to be his best feminine self.  Because, if you fight the child's nature, you will most likely be the reason they begin to suffer from gender dysphoria; and it's gender dysphoria that's the largest cause of transgender people transitioning.  When a transgender person who's suffering gender dysphoria transitions, it tends to ease the psychological stress they're experiencing and let's them feel like themselves.

    In other words:  Be kind!